April 13, 2011

• Catnapped!

  The 2nd Xeries: Catnapped!

  What you might’ve missed.

  “They’re…they’re GONE! They’ve been stolen!!!!”
   
  Nani’s cry slices through the cool air, shattering the peaceful morning atmosphere of the neighborhood. If anyone had still been asleep, they weren’t now.

  Nani’s kneeling on her porch, head buried in her hands, as I climb the stairs and kneel next to her. “What’s, gone, Nani? What’s been stolen?” I ask.
  “Not what,” she replies, lifting her tear-drenched face to look at me, “but who. They stole my babies!!”
  Now this took me by surprise. I had no idea Nani had even one kid, much less kids, plural. I had no idea what to say, but luckily my friend and Nani’s neighbor, Sim, came to my rescue as he came up on the porch.
  “You mean Ghost and Twitch?”
  Wow, can’t say those are the best names I’ve ever heard. Poor kids.
  “Yes. When I looked in their basket this morning, they weren’t there!”
  Basket!?
  “Do you think they got outside on their own during the night?”
  “I doubt it. They never have before. But I did notice my kitchen window was unlocked, though it was still shut.”
  “They couldn’t have gotten out through it?” I ask.
  “No, I just said it was shut, and it’s not like they could have closed it behind them,” Nani replied.
  “Right, because…they’re too small…” I half ask.
  “And they don’t have opposable thumbs,” Sim pointed out.
  Yikes! Poor kids…
  “Well, how about I have a look inside and see if I can find any clues,” I offer.
  “Of course! Anything to help find my darlings,” she says as she gets up and lets me into her house. While I begin looking around, she stays on the porch to inform inquiring neighbors of the situation. As I look, I see things that immediately make some things very clear. Like the two bowls on the floor filled with milk, a scratching post in the corner, a few toys found in a pet aisle scattered around, and most helpful, and picture of the victim and two feline friends perched on her lap.
  “They’re cats!” I exclaim with realization. Now that I know who is missing, I can focus on how they have come to be missing. I locate the window in question and find it is indeed unlocked yet unopened. Directly under it is the counter, so one could easily climb in and out on this side without being harmed. I go outside into the backyard to see it from the other side, and there I discover two things about our culprit: this is in fact the entrance and exit used by the thief, and the thief is an amateur, for there, underneath the window, was a wooden step ladder, still dripping from last night’s rain.
  “Hey, what’s that?” a voice behind me asks, startling me so that I almost slip on the wet grass. The voice belongs to Kami, the other next door neighbor.
  “Hi Kami. I was just wondering the same thing…say, you wouldn’t happen to have seen anything suspicious last night, would you?”
  “No, I was too busy practicing for my performance coming up.” (Ah yes, she’s supposed to sing at the mayor’s birthday party at the town hall soon.) “Though it was a bit hard to practice with all that racket.”
  “What racket?” I inquire.
  “Oh, my other neighbor was out late last night, mowing the lawn, of all things.”
  “Hmm, maybe he saw something.” I thank her then head past her house to the quaint little home of Ringo. One of Xanga’s newest residents, Ringo has been here for around a year. I hear he’s quite the musician, playing anything from the guitar to the digaredoo, besides being a talented clapper. He’s a pilot of some sort, flying over oil pipelines to ensure all is well, or something like that. As I come up to his house, I see him in the garage, working on something on a table.
  “Hello, Mr. Ringo? Can I have a moment?”
  “Ah, Detective Tigah. Or course, I can always spare a moment for one of Xanga’s finest,” he says, shaking my hand. That’s right, he thinks I’m an actual police detective, not just a private investigator. If only my salary thought that, too. Oh well, he’ll figure it out eventually.
  “I heard you were up rather late last night.”
  “Oh, is that what this is about? I wasn’t doing anything illegal, I promise. My lawn mower broke down,” he informs me, pointing to a purple lawn mower parked in the corner of the garage. “I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with it, so I finally ended up taking it to Gerilynn, and by the time it was up and running, it was after dark.”
  “So why not wait until today to mow,” I ask.
  “I knew I’d be working on my special project today. After all, I have a deadline to meet. My mayor has to be done in time for the party, but I’ve only finished the torso, and just started the head this morning, though I’ve discovered his jaw line is a bit difficult to shape.” He obviously saw the confused look on my face, and so showed me what he had been working on. Sure enough, it was the body, and sort of the face, of our mayor, made completely out of duct tape. “It’s sort of a hobby. I build duct tape masterpieces, then sell them online. The city council saw my work and asked me to build a duct tape mayor for his birthday.”
  “Oh. That’s…nice. Listen, did you see anything suspicious last night while you were out?”
  “Uh…no, can’t say I did. I was pretty focused on mowing, trying to get done before it rained.”
  “Oh, well thank you.”
  “Anytime, detective.”
  And with that, I head across the street to Gerilynn’s house. As I walk up the driveway, I see her working on an old beat up jalopy. “Hey, Gerilynn. What’s this?” She peeks her head around the open hood of the car to answer, “They somehow found the mayor’s first car, and they want me to restore it to working condition as a present for him.”
  “Wow. Is it possible?”
  “Sure. I think. But the pay is good, and so am I!” she declares.
  “I’m reminded of that every time my car breaks down. Speaking of broken things, I heard you had an odd repair yesterday.”
  “Are you talking about Ringo’s purple piece of poop? Yeah, that was interesting. I heard it last night though, and his grass is shorter, so I assume I did a good job.”
  “So you were up last night, too?”
  “Yup. Reading an epic page-turner. But my body wasn’t as excited as my mind, and I almost fell asleep right on my couch. That’s when I heard that awful screech.”
  “Ringo’s lawn mower?”
  “No, it was after that. It was this black Mercedes that came tearing down the street. It had to slam on the brakes for something, then it zoomed off that way,” she said, pointing in the opposite direction of Nani’s house. Only one person lived that way…
  “Well, thanks. And good luck with that present,” I tell her, then I make my way toward the colossal abode of Ms. Aleksa Ivanov. Thankfully I didn’t have to trek all the way up her mile long driveway, for she was at the curb, ripping up what appeared to be today’s issue of the Daily Xangan. She was throwing pieces of it in her garbage as she muttered angrily.
  “…stupid cat! He thinks this is his town. Well, it’s not! It’s mine! Mine!!”
  “Uh, Ms Ivanov, is everything alright?”
  She jumps a little, then calmly turns around, smiling.
  “Ah, Mr. Tigah. Yes everything is fine. What can I do for you?”
  “Well, I was wondering if you could tell me where you were last night.”
  “This must be about that poor girl. Not because she has lost the cats, but because she had them in the first place! They are disgusting, vile creatures, and they should not exist! Especially the big jungle ones!”
  “Uh, well, I heard you were out late.”
  “Yes, and I would have been home sooner if it wasn’t for that mindless old lady, not watching where she was going. I had to slam on my brakes and swerve to keep from hitting her. She almost dropped her backpack. Would’ve served her right. She almost caused me to crash my Mercedes.”
  “Who was this?”
  “That woman who lives on the corner, oh what’s her name? The retired driver.”
  “Ms. Rumcake?”
  “Yes that’s the one. Now is that all? I have a very busy day, much to plan.”
  “Oh, you’re on the party planning committee for the mayor’s birthday, right?”
  “Hm? Oh, yes, that. Yes, that’s what I’m talking about. That’s what I’m planning. Nothing else. Just that. Now have a good day.”
  “Thanks, you too.”
  So now back to the beginning of the street. Boy, I sure am getting my exercise in for today. On the right-hand corner of First and Main, across the street from Sim, lives the retired Ms. Rumcake. She was once one of the greatest circuit racers to ever grace the track. Now, she’s one of those active senior types, playing golf and mah jongg. As I come up to her house, I see her black-with-yellow-pinstripe Fiat Spider convertible parked in the driveway. I must say, she has good taste.
  I ring the doorbell. “Well, hello Mr. Tigah,  please come in,” she says, opening the door.
  “Thank you, Ms. Rumcake. I promise I won’t take up much of your time.”
  “Please, call me Rummy. And nonsense, stay as long as you like. I enjoy the company of a handsome young man,” she says with a wink. Not knowing how to reply, I just smile back at her.
  “Please, have a seat, I’m almost finished making a fresh batch of hot cocoa. It’s nippy out, and I see you have no jacket.”
  “Thank you Ms. Rum-,er, Rummy,” I say as I take a seat on the couch and she goes into the kitchen to finish preparing the cocoa.
  “So have you heard about that new superhero?” she calls out from the kitchen.
  “Are you talking about that lion guy, Roar?”
  “Yeah, that’s the one. Didn’t you read the paper today?”
  “No, I haven’t been back to the office yet,” I reply.
  “Oh, well there’s a story on the front page of the Daily Xangan about how he foiled some big bank robbery yesterday. Too bad their leader got away. I guess none of the culprits are talking. Hey, maybe you two should team up? The handsome detective and the mysterious superhero, you’d be quite a team. Even if you didn’t catch anyone, you’d b the heart-throb of the city, haha! Say, would you mind coming in here and getting the marshmallows? They’re on the top shelf and I can’t reach.”
  “Sure thing,” I reply and make my way toward the kitchen, but almost trip over a box on the floor.
  “Oh, watch out for the kitty box.”
  Odd. I didn’t see any cats around here…
  “You have cats?” I ask, stepping into the kitchen.
  “Oh no, not anymore. See, it’s there, on the highest shelf. Normally I’d use my step ladder, but I seemed to have misplaced it. Thank you” she says, taking the bag from me.
  “Now, I know Xanga’s best detective didn’t come here to shoot the breeze with an old washed up driver, so what did you come her for, Mr. Tigah?”
  “Well, I wouldn’t say I’m the best. And you’re hardly washed up, but you’re right. I came to inquire about your whereabouts last night.”
  “I was at a girlfriend’s playing mah jonng,” she tells me, handing me a steaming cup of cocoa, complete with marshmallows.
  “I have an eye witness stating you were out walking.”
  “Well, I stayed later than normal. And since my friend doesn’t live too far, and it was such a clear night, I decided to walk home. I assume your witness must be that grouchy Ivanov lady. She very nearly killed me last night with that wimpy car of hers. I ought teach her how to drive.”
  “Yes, well, you had a backpack?”
  “Of course. For my mah jonng tiles. It’s not like tic tac toe y’know. You can’t draw them on a piece of paper.”
  “I see. Well, I must be getting back to the office. Thank you for the chat and the cocoa.”
  “Anytime, Tigah. You should stop by more often.”
  Finally, I return to my office. I shut off the light and kick my feet up on my desk to rest and think.
  There’s Ringo. But he has a solid alibi, and there was grass caked on his mower. It was odd, but it checked out.
  Then there’s Aleska Ivanov. She acted very suspicious. Come to think of it, she never did tell me where she was last night. She obviously hates cats, so maybe she decided to purge her neighborhood of them.
  Finally, there’s Rummy. Why have a cat box, but no cats? And were mah jonng tiles really the contents of that bag? A few other things don’t add up…

  So, who is the catnapper?

  the conclusion
  ———————————————————–

  Aaron Tigah/creator/writer………………………………Like_A_Tigah
  Nani………………………………………………………….Queen_of_You188
  Sim…………………………………………………………………..Simbathe2nd
  Kami……………………………………………………………………..x3style
  Ringo………………………………………………………..ringothepirate
  Gerilynn…………………………………………………….brokenheartshurt
  Akeska Ivanov……………………………………………………Cestovatelka
  Rumcake……………………………………………………..bronze_for_gold
  

  • 7:21 pm
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