I can almost here them laughing. I was told they would be here! It's just not fair! I gave up my weekend for them, and they don't show? Everyone said they wanted to get together with me. It didn't matter when or where (apparently they're flexible). I never personally asked them, and I haven't even seen them for a while. But everyone that had seen them said they wanted to get together some time. I thought that was pretty cool, because I wanted to hang out with them,too. I mean, everyone does! So I made plans as soon as possible. I gave up my Thursady evening, all of Friday, and most of Saturday. Just for them. I missed our church's turkey dinner, for crying out loud! I rode with my dad for 2 hours to the rendezvous. My dad had a couple of things to do Friday morining, so we decided we would meet up with them Friday evening.

I sat outside, in the rain (good think it was just drizzling!) for 2 hours! TWO HOURS! They never showed. Maybe they were busy, right? I mean, they've got lots of things to do, and everyone is busy during this season. So I gave them the benefit of the doubt. I would have gone Saturday morning, but I wasn't feeling very well, so I moved it up to late afternoon. This time I waited two and a half hours for them, and they still didn't show!

I don't understand. Everyone that saw them said I should go see them, too. Yet I didn't see a single one of them!

this same thing happened last year, too!

Stupid deer...another weekend wasted hunting.

I posted one of those pics that say "describe me in one word!" on my Facebook the other day. I didn't really expect anything. Mostly just "funny"s and "fluffy"s (see a comment in this post for explanation). But one friend surprised me by saying "complex."
Complex? I'm not complex. I asked her what she meant, and she said, "Well you're complex b/c you have layers of emotion that you don't let many people see..."
Yeah right! Then I thought for a second...and came to the sudden conclusion that she's right.

On a semi-related note, I was talking today with some of my friends who have Xangas, when I suddenly realized something else: I can't truly call any of you that I don't know in real life friends.
I immediately turned the thought away. "That can be true," I reasoned. "I'm on more than I used to be. I have 200+ plus 'friends,' and Dan the Theologian has even been to my site! There has to be someone on here that I could call a friend!"
I thought. And thought. And quickly realized I've been an inactive participator.
Sure, I've posted things, done a guest blog, gotten in a few scraps, and even have a few vandave jokes here and there. I comment as often as I can, and I've told I don't know how many people that if they ever need anything to message me. I mean it, but I don't really show it.

Back to the first part: It's true, I don't really show my emotional side. I'm not sure why, really. Maybe it's because I'm always trying to be funny, I don't know.

But I figure that's why I'm not as attached to Xanga as I feel I should be. I've never posted anything personal on here. I've expected friendships to just suddenly happen. But from what I can tell is a true, virtual friendship is made when two people discover they have something personal in common, or one has an answer to another's problem, or something like that. But that doesn't happen with me because the only thing you guys know about me is my first name and I'm pretty funny. Oh, and a bunch of kids know me as "Fluffy."
It's not that I'm afraid of some creeper reading my personal dilemma or anything like that, it's just that I'm not very good at opening up, I guess.
But I'm going to work on that. I have too much bottled up stuff to have it just sitting around. No more far off, everything-having-humor Tigah. Yeah, i'll still do my spoofs and what not, I have to. It's mostly what I am. But now, there will be some serious stuff mixed in.

It's time for a new Tigah. An up close and personal one.

I am Tigah.

I am Aaron.

This is my Xanga.

Have you ever tried really hard to get into a group of people, but for some reason, it just didn't happen? You know you were just as good, if not better than some of the people in that group, but no matter what you did, you just weren't noticed?
Then suddenly, out of the blue, you're recognized. Someone sends you the infamous letter, gives you the secret code, shows you the unmistakable signal, acts out the indescribable handshake, or whatever it is that lets you know you've made it.
Finally, after all your hard work, you've been accepted!

Yeah, that happened to me.

I have been trying so hard here on Xanga to get recognized. I know, I know, it's not about numbers and all that. But c'mon, who doesn't want to belong to that prestigious group of Xangans to which TheTheologiansCafe, MyxlDove, TheBigShowAtUD, AlterEgo909, one_eared_batman, Simbathe2nd, My_HAT_is_older_than_you, and many, many more belong? But for some reason, I just wasn't up to par.

Until now.

I'm not really sure what caused it. Why did it take so long? I've anxiously waited for my inbox to tell me I had finally arrived. But alas! my inbox would not yield the message. And so I remained desolate, undiscovered, and downhearted.

You must know by now what I'm talking about. No, no, not the petty thing of getting featured, nor the esteemed rank of Top Blogs. Nay, not even a rec' from Dan The Theologian.

No, when I logged on today, I didn't receive any of the afore mentioned honors; instead, my feedback log told me I had finally been counted worthy to obtain...

The stalker message.

Yes, I know what you're thinking. "But how? How is it that the Xangan powers that be have graced you of all people with such a blessing?"
I know, I know. I, too, had my doubts. So I clicked on the (1) next to the message inbox button. This is what my unbelieving eyes read:

"My name`s Donna !!
I really feel shy, but I`ve 2 say u, that you`r just so coool )... It was a wonder to detect ur page but nowadays I am sure it`s a fate))
U are superman... but I know for sure that in your real life u`l impress me more and more:again and again!! ;)
that`s incredible... but I`m from too!
So... I`d like 2 become acquainted with u, Like_A_Tigah!
This site does not accept all my images... :(
so the most revealing photos I uploaded here: http://pieceoftrash/stupidnonexistingsite.org
Like_A_Tigah, I think you`ll like them and will send me smth to start our challenge ))!!
love you honey ))!!"


Go ahead. Read it again. It's really true. I have finally advanced to the next level of Xangadom.
I can finally feel like I belong!

Thank you, Donna. Thank you for seeing the "superman" in me. For believing that I am "just so coool."
Thank you, Fate, for detecting my page. Thank you for knowing that in real life, I could impress someone more and more: again and again, and that that fact is incredible.

Thank you, my Xangan friends, for putting up with me!

Have a good weekend!